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The CLUAS Archive: 1998 - 2011

The Beautiful New Born Children

A review of their album 'Hey people!'

The Beautiful New Born Children Review Snapshot:
One of Domino Records most recent signings, TBNC have made an album that's the aural equivalent of being grabbed by the scruff of the neck, swung around backwards until you think you are going blind, only to be dumped, in a heap, on the floor of a room full of attention deficit kids high on cocoa cola. Ouch!

The Cluas Verdict: 4.5 out of 10.

Full Review:
Most new born children are indeed quite beautiful. They are also insanely loud, attention seeking and likely to leave a wreck of debris in their wake. This is not dissimilar to the quite grown-up Beautiful New Born Children - the band!

'Do the Do' is a fiercely energetic punk assault and a decent enough opener. Second track, 'Paper Mill' confirms however, that the borderline irritating vocal delivery is going to be our lot for the rest of the album since there is no change in sound, vocal style or recording technique for the duration. Lyrics like "I would like to boogie down" are, I'm guessing, written with a pinch of salt, but are a touch too throw away for my liking. The ramshackle style is not entirely without its charms, when the song ends in a raucous cacophony of drums and thrashing guitars, driven by a hell for leather bass line and obligatory feedback fadeout.

'I Do Too' is all very cockney London with guitar parts reminiscent of early Supergrass offerings and a touch of the Libertines. 'Left, Right, Forward' is the Buzzcocks without the wry observations. In fact, it's kind of hard to comment on the lyrics since they can be barely made out - headphones up full and ear straining aside.

'Hey Heartbreaker' has a nice guitar intro, not unlike the Pixies at their most manic and the band sound really tight here. It's one of the better songs on the album. 'Up and Down and Round and Around' is a noisy bastard of a tune and makes me want to hurl my stereo onto the ground and beat it to a pulp - but I'm starting to think that's the point. The feedback on this track, tuneless as it is, manages to drown out everything else, but is never fully let loose. This feedback has been poured over, contrived and produced to the last detail. Oh the anarchy of it all! While the album is incredibly short by today's standards, rolling in at around 20 minutes, it could still have had two minutes shaved off the end of this song - someone think of the children please!

If you like your music thin on substance and full of short, sharp stings - you might just like these Beautiful New Born Children. Personally, I'd be happy enough to leave them in a basket on the doorstep of a more understanding home.


(bullet) To buy a new or (very reasonably priced) 2nd hand copy of this album on Amazon just click here.