Una
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1725
 | | 23 Aug 2006 4:24 PM |
| | yet another reason to love http://www.mcsweeneys.net/
BEDTIME STORIES BY THOM YORKE.
BY DAVID HART
- - - -
The Happy Little Bunny
Once there was a little bunny who had a little furry tail and a little shiny nose. But the electrodeath cloud of commerce strangled it and its foxhole was converted to a parking lot, a parking lot, a parking lot. Ample parking asphalted over bunny bones. Everyone everyone everyone get in.
Hannah and Gunther
Hannah and her brother Gunther lived in a happy wooden house at the end of a windy road by the forest. Chomping tree-eating machines grinding, halting, grinding the forest destroyed the trees—birches branches Branford—to make end tables and politician luncheon plates, spin spin spin. I can't feel my legs anymore.
Whoopsie the Clumsy Dragon
In the dragon family in the enchanted cave, there lived Mother, Father, Brother, and Whoopsie. Whoopsie tried to be like the other dragons, but anytime he tried to help he ended up making a mess. Diplomats destroy the ozone and waiting, wailing. Crawl in the hole, leap the banshee, and eat the sunlight. Tonight, tomorrow, why bother? Another. Another. I'm a grown monkey wastechain.
Everybody Enjoys Manners!
When we eat, it's fun to have our manners eat with us! Wear your napkin on your lap and don't hit your sister, even if she throws peas at you. Reason your reasons, razors shave the planet clean. Blood fills the rivers, clogs the tubes. I want to die, eat your ice cream. | | | |
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Unicron
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1687
| | 23 Aug 2006 4:31 PM |
| | Yawn, Thom Yorke is a whiney bloke that gets worked up over politics and the enviroment. The sky is also blue. | | | |
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Una
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1725
| | 23 Aug 2006 4:33 PM |
| | what, it's funny.
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Antistar
Very Busy Member
Posts:547
| | 23 Aug 2006 4:43 PM |
| | It is funny, brilliant in fact. About time somebody parodied Yorke's nonsensical, quasi-'stream of consciousness' 'lyrics'.....'lyrics, eating me, eating me, dark holes of anti-matter, anti-matter = 5+7= floating down the Liffey, Liffey, Liffey, Liffey, burn Israel, burn Bush...Bush...Bush...giant airbags punctured by depressed androids...uptight fisherman! Get out of my dreams!!! x15 (fade out)
I actually love Radiohead. | | | |
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Rev Jules
Insanely Busy Member
Posts:1110
| | 23 Aug 2006 4:55 PM |
| | That sounds like good fun
'Jack and Jill' by 50 cent
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
But Jill was a hoe
and Jack didn't know
She put a cap in his ass
And stole his dough
Muthaf*cka! | | | |
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dera
Busy Member
Posts:164
| | 23 Aug 2006 5:31 PM |
| | Jack and Jill by the Wedding Present
Jack and Jill went up a hill
to fetch a pail of water
But Jack hadn't washed his hair
Jill went off with Kevin
That Kevin is such a bastard.
(edit: I love the Wedding Present more than... tea. And jam. And kisses.) | | | |
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Unicron
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1687
| | 23 Aug 2006 5:47 PM |
| quote:
Originally posted by Una
what, it's funny.
Respectfully disagree. | | | |
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Archie
Very Busy Member
Posts:439
| | 23 Aug 2006 5:56 PM |
| | Ah, it is funny. | | | |
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blacksheep
Getting Into It Member
Posts:50
| | 24 Aug 2006 9:40 AM |
| | Rev. Jules wrote
'Jack and Jill' by 50 cent
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
But Jill was a hoe
and Jack didn't know
And she put a cap in his ass
Before making off wit his dough
To Mexico
Muthaf*cka!
Thats way better than anything 50 cent ever wrote! | | | |
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Una
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1725
| | 24 Aug 2006 9:58 AM |
| | 'Jack and Jill' by Explosions In The Sky
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
buuzzzzzhhhhhhhhffghghghigooooqoqqqqooowswwwwwaawwwniiirrrh | | | |
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Unicron
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1687
| | 24 Aug 2006 10:22 AM |
| | Think you missed a few chiming guitar parts there :P | | | |
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Una
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1725
| | 24 Aug 2006 10:26 AM |
| | *chime chime* | | | |
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Norman Schwarzkopf
Very Busy Member
Posts:428
| | 24 Aug 2006 11:03 AM |
| | Jack And Jill went up the hill
Jack's settin fire to his telephone bill.
Jill gettin savvy
With the rattlesnake skin
Broken modem smokin
In a fibreglass bin.
Get crazy with the cheez wizz!
By Beck. Please enjoy. Hell yes. | | | |
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dera
Busy Member
Posts:164
| | 24 Aug 2006 11:10 AM |
| | Jack and Jill by Sleater-Kinney
Jack and Jill went up a hill
to fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down and broke his crown
and Jill screamed: 'I DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING'
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Antistar
Very Busy Member
Posts:547
| | 24 Aug 2006 11:11 AM |
| quote:
Originally posted by Una
'Jack and Jill' by Explosions In The Sky
Jack and Jill
Went up the hill
To fetch a pail of water
buuzzzzzhhhhhhhhffghghghigooooqoqqqqooowswwwwwaawwwniiirrrh
Jack and Jill by Explosions In The Sky
Proper version:
' '
' '
' '
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Una
CLUAS Forum Junkie
Posts:1725
| | 24 Aug 2006 11:15 AM |
| quote:
Originally posted by dera
Jack and Jill by Sleater-Kinney
Jack and Jill went up a hill
to fetch a pail of water
Jack fell down and broke his crown
and Jill screamed: 'I DON'T OWE YOU ANYTHING'
bravo! | | | |
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off the post
Busy Member
Posts:290
| | 24 Aug 2006 11:47 AM |
| | Jack and Jill by Spiritualized...
Jack and Jill wnet up the hill,
To fetch an ounce of smack,
Jack fell down and broke his crown,
Jill lit up some crack....Swaayyyyy...Loooow | | | |
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yoshimi
Getting Into It Member
Posts:63
| | 24 Aug 2006 12:41 PM |
| | Jack and Jill by Eminem
Jack and Jill
Went up a Hill (in North Detroit)
To fetch a pail
of water
f**k that Jack
He's on crack
But Hailey..
she's my daughter
Up got Jack
And shouted out
I AM THE SLIM SHADY YES I'M THE SLIM SHADY
And Jill she just looked on
f**k you bitch
You don't know s**t
That slag, she's Hailey's mom
ais.
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yoshimi
Getting Into It Member
Posts:63
| | 24 Aug 2006 6:13 PM |
| | You know, that looks much more vulgar written down than it sounded in my head. Hip hop, eh?
ais. | | | |
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Earthhorse
Getting Into It Member
Posts:55
| | 24 Aug 2006 7:17 PM |
| | All the parodies on this thread have been better than the originals that started it. You should all write for McSweeneys. | | | |
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